Sunday, August 13, 2017

Aspergers Mental Illness and Church

Within the LDS church we teach a lot about things like Eternal Marriage, Families can be Together Forever, Service, Atonement of Jesus Christ and so on. 

Today in Sunday School we talked about Eternal Marriage. What it was and how you should treat your spouse and children. Comments have came up, things like:

  • Don't take your frustrations on your spouse to social media. If you do have a problem with your spouse then talk to you're spouse alone not to anyone else, unless you do need to have a therapist to be a "coach" and to help create a safe environment to discuss hard issues. 
  • It is ok to set strong boundaries with your spouse or anyone else, so you can have your time, and so that you can be you. Or to in-laws so that you and your spouse can be going in the direction that you want to go as a couple. 
  • Love beyond the Grave. that is one of the concepts that we as a Church teach and can allow to have a Marriage that is not just "Death do you Part" your marriage can be forever if you are married in the LDS Temple. It is a beautiful concept and lots of couples or singles for some other reason do not have that chance to be married in the LDS Temple but, will have that chance. 
  • Just because you are married in the LDS Temple, that does not guarantee that you will still have that chance to stay together for all eternity. If you don't treat each other right, then you're spouse might not choose you. 

There where more obviously, but they were just the key points that I wanted touch on. You see my brother who has Asperger's, and Mental Illness, was having a hard time through that class. He wants his "wife".  He wants it so badly everything that God has promised to him if he lived the teachings of Jesus Christ. My brother is no different then we are. Who doesn't want a love that will last long beyond the grave? Shakespeare, believed in it enough to write Romeo and Juliet. There have been countless Love Serenades and Ballads throughout the years. People believed in it enough to write them.

Then came the combine class about  Self Reliance. It was good, it was just an introduction on what you might expect from taking a 12 week course that the church provides. I have not taken that course yet, I am sure that I will.... However, as the class progress my brother got agitated and a little anxiety started to show through his bodily physical movements. I just put my hand on his back, patted him a little, told him that he was ok, he calmed down and then I asked if he wanted to go home. He said yes. So I took him home about 15 minutes before church ended. 

You see, one of the tools that his therapist gave us is to be aware of my brothers needs and his anxiety, if we need to leave then ok, we will. We don't mean to be rude, we don't do it because the speaker might be boring, or we think they are stupid or anything in that negative sphere. It is just sometimes we need to take him out of the situation so that he can feel safe and or accepted. 

Not everyone on the Autism Spectrum, will have the same reaction and need to be taken out of the situation. Some are ok, if someone just holds their hand and accept them for who they are. Everyone who are on the Autism Spectrum will respond different and therefore will have a different way to handle whatever is giving them anxiety/agitation/stress, or whatever it might be and it depends on how bad it is. Just pay attention to them and just give any extra help that they might need. 

The key is patience and love. 

Cheers everyone!