Friday, March 3, 2017

My expirence with the Autistic Spectrum

I get the comment all of the time that people know what the Autism Spectrum is. They tell me that there nephew/cousin/neighbor/church member/ etc is on the Autism Spectrum so they know all about it. Hmmm.....Right. 

No, you don't. Thank you. I have lived with my brother who is on the Autistic Spectrum, (Asperger's in fact) all my life, I am the youngest of my family. So yes, I do have life experience, but I am no expert, but then who is? And....first of all...not every person on the Spectrum are the same. They are as individual as Snowflakes.( Not that new stupid political term, but the it's-so-cold-the-water-coming-down-turns-into-ice crystals, snowflakes.) 

Unbeknownst to my parents and I, we were going to have the ride of our lives. You see, just over a year ago this brother of mine developed psychosis on top of his Asperger's. It was a year of fighting for his rights with the state of Utah, and my Mothers right as a Mother to keep her son safe.
  • My mother had to go to the Utah courts to get guardianship over him. She won.  
  • Me, I fought with him to take his pills. He thought that we were poisoning him. Nothing could be further from the truth. I even wrestled him for the pills in question, he was going to throw-them-a-way in the garbage. Later I was told that you never do anything like that with someone with mental illness. Oh well....I won. 
  • My mother fought with the State of Utah for my brothers Medical Care, and his medical insurance.  She won.
  • My mother fought with the doctors to give her son adequate medical care. Long battle, but she won. 
  • My mother fought with the creditors to get his Student loans forgiven. She found a company to help her. In turn he can't have a steady job for 3 years. Well we are not worried about that because of his disability and his mental illness, really he can't do anything for very long. His mental stamina along that come with his Asperger's and the mental illness wont let him. She won.
 I assure you, if we need do it all over again....we will. My mother and I have become a force to be reckoned with.

We told a friend of ours what our year have been like. She was shocked, amazed. She told us that  "enduring to the end" we think that it only means our own physical health, but no, it means to endure whatever life throw at us. This takes on a whole new meaning of "Enduring to the End"1 Nephi 13:27

   And blessed are they who shall seek to bring forth my Zion at that day, for they shall have the gift and the power of the Holy Ghost; and if they endure unto the end they shall be lifted up at the last day, and shall be saved in the everlasting kingdom of the Lamb; and whoso shall publish peace, yea, tidings of great joy, how beautiful upon the mountains shall they be.

It has been a very hard year. Last spring we thought that we were doing good. Hmmmm. No, we were wrong. We are fortunate to have a therapist for my bother to come into our home and give him and us the tools that we need to take care of my brother. We needed these tools. We need to first make sure that we are ok, then we can take care of my brothers needs. Slowly but surely with the help of the therapist, we are making progress, they are there, no matter how stubble they are, it is still progress.

Now like the analogy of the fitness journey. When someone is on that journey, they eat right, they work out, but sooner or later, they will hit bumps in the road or that fitness plateau. It's normal. Well it is the same with our year. We have hit bumps in the road, and have hit the plateau, the therapist assures us that this is all normal and there will be more.

It has been emotional frustrating, taxing, and exhaustion. There have been times that we all wanted to give up, someway, somehow just give up. We have been blessed by God. He has gave to us the mental stamina, the will power, the knowledge, and more tender mercies. All of this progress it is all because of Him. If we do everything in our power to do what God wants us to do then He will bear us up.And He has. I am so thankful for Him and what He has done.

"The unique burdens in each of our lives help us to rely upon the merits, mercy, and grace of the Holy Messiah" ~Elder Bednar~